We, the ABC, should do a monthly (or bi-weekly if we want to get wild) movie night, either at a proper theater or at one of our homes. Linz and Elisha already said they were down for seeing
Harry Potter and the Scary Ghost Lady and
Hot Nekkid Mars Dude movies in February and March (respectively), but I don't want to stop there. I think I saw a grand total of 3 movies last year, and every single time, Jake went off about how dumb they were.
YEAH, they were dumb, but I like dumb movies. They're the best ones to make fun of, especially if they're horror.
So, we've got February and March down, but not January. WTF! I have complied a list of January movies, so's we may decide:
The Devil Inside - horror - something about demonic possession (SURPRISE), same director as
Paranormal Activity, which in itself makes me not want to see it.
Mission: Impossible, Ghost Protocol - action - Tom Cruise movies make me sad in my pants.
Alvin and the Chipmunks - family - singing rodents do stuff. It's getting better reviews than the second movie, but I'm pretty sure if I recorded myself changing Camille's diaper it would get better reviews than the second A&tC movie.
Sherlock Holmes - action/thriller - Robert Downey Jr. does smart British stuff. Also, explosions. This is the one I really want to see, bad reviews be damned.
We Bought a Zoo - family/comedy - I generally stay the fuck away from family comedies, and this movie isn't making me want to change my mind at all. Widowed father makes terrible decision with money and buys a run-down zoo. Magic and friendship happen as they piece together the rathole animal prison.
War Horse - drama - the story of the remarkable friendship between some horse and a British guy. Any movie that details the "remarkable friendship" between a human and an animal instantly loses my interest. It's a fucking horse. They don't make friendships: they eat grass and shit while they walk. The synopsis doesn't even mention "based on a true story," which means any amazingness is complete and utter doodie (horse doodie). Directed by Spielberg, which means the horse is actually an alien cyborg. Oh yeah, they all probably die at the end. SPOILERS!
The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo - drama/thriller - the synopsis says "this movie is about a book" and that's it. Sigh. From the trailer, I can come up with a synopsis of my own: lovable outcast Some Chick helps Grizzled Policedude with a murder case because she has magic powers or some shit. Also, she has a tattoo.
The Adventures of Tintin - creeptastic cartoon - I will absolutely not see this movie. The GCI is too real, but not real enough. There's some psychological term for that, but I forget what it is. In any case, it's also the reason I was way too freaked out at
The Polar Express to even pay attention to anything happening in the movie.
New Year's Eve - drama -
Cloverfield without the awesome monster. So, a really boring movie about people doing stuff in New York.
The Darkest Hour - action/scifi - some kids run around post-alien-apocalypse Moscow and engage in Communist shenanigans.
Fun aside: if you Google "communist aliens" and you are not a TeaBagger, you will be offended.
Hugo - family/thriller - homeless French child meets toy peddler and his kid, and hijinks ensue. This is simultaneously being described as a "stunning visual treat" and "a personal statement disguised as a sellout."All the reviews agree that it's a visually stunning movie, but the negatives go on to say that the story is simply atrocious. I think I'll call pass on this one.
So far, my fave is Sherlock Holmes. What do you bitches think?
